At the beginning of this week, in the world of celebrity, there has been a lot buzz around the recent marriage of pop star Cheryl Fernandez-Versini (formerly known as Cheryl Cole). You may be thinking, why I am opening with a news story about celebrity and marriage. I’m talking about this, as it is an everyday like topic. And in this world, people like to talk about what others are up to – sometimes referred to as gossip. Secondly, love and romance is one of those popular topics as it touches upon the universal religion of love.
“I do not know Cheryl”
I do not know Cheryl Fernandez-Versini personally, like a lot of the people commenting on her recent marriage. But found it interesting some of the negative comments suggesting that it was a ‘fools rush in’ type of romance, as she allegedly met her now husband in May of this year. Usually, I choose not to participate in this, especially as it is not a constructive use of my energy. Who am I to judge, anyway? Maybe I should retract the last sentence, as it is very human to look at an object, situation and person; and make a judgement. Judgements can easily be made on an outer appearance. For example, the rude waitress at the restaurant whom you may assume must not get enough love and action at home. So we can all do that. But how about trying to put more of a positive spin on things?
As I begin this next section, I can imagine that there are going to be a combination of people reading this. To be more specific, some of the following Mr Men characters:
Little Miss Wise
Little Miss Star
There are many more characters but I will take a pause here. You will see from the above that there are many people with different characteristics, experiences that will have an impact on how they choose to see things. The character Mr Happy, will probably of heard the news and said, “good for Cheryl, finding love and getting married”. Mr Worry may instead of taking a different stance, thinking about the why it may not work out. Coming from fear based thoughts. This now takes me to thoughts and being aware of whether your thoughts are: 1) true 2) constructive 3) helpful and 4) positive. Why is this important? It is important since you cannot escape from your thoughts. How you feel will have an impact on your body, how you interact with the world, and how the world interacts with you. Question: Do you want to feel happier and healthier? And, no I am not following with an infomercial.
Throwing rotten tomatoes
Going back to celebrity watching, these days we are spoilt with the amount of mediums where we can find out the latest story. Be entertained. You can argue that this has been going on for a long time. In times gone by there were public punishments, humiliation and executions. Let’s take the throwing of rotten vegetables. It was not very nice for recipient, but may have been entertaining for some of the audience. Is this how you want to be? At this point you may want to ask yourself, “Why am I choosing to participate in this?” Some of the common answers to this question may be:
- It is entertaining.
- I want some escapism.
- The celebrities have signed up to be public.
- It makes me feel better about my life.
Taking the last sentence, we can spin this. Yes, it is good to see people vulnerabilities, as this is part of what makes us human. So in Cheryl’s case you may say that this is a person who seems to have gone through some love battles, but all she is looking for is connecting further to love in a relationship. Some relationships will last a long time, whilst others may be shorter but there is always something to be gained. A bit like the soul mate argument, whereby a person may only meant to be there for the part of your journey. Does this spin make you feel better then coming from the mindset, “That will not last. That’s heading for heartbreak” Question: did that last sentence feel more heavy, rather than light?
So next time when you decide to comment on a person in the public arena, what will be your thoughts? Negative, positive, or constructive? Do you want to [really] be throwing rotten tomatoes?